The Heart of the Matter

Often in matters of love and friendship we may take for granted one another’s heart. What am I talking about? That “what did he/she mean by that?” feeling you get once in a while when your gut kind of drops down into your stomach and you question yourself and your relationship over something that seems so trivial in retrospect. And then the other party, noticing this change in you, backtracks and wonders if they did wrong by you. 
It’s not too far fetched to relate to, is it? It just seems so easy for us to forget the importance of protecting each other’s heart and we get comfortable with each other to the point where we may overstep boundaries. That’s when we are vulnerable and get hurt the most.
In these instances, it’s most important to communicate clearly together just what your intentions were when the comment was made or those boundaries were overstepped. If your heart is in fact in the right place, you have nothing to lose by telling the truth and clearing the air. If you are the party who took offense or felt wounded, you also have nothing to lose from asking for clarity/clarification. Maybe you misread the situation. Perhaps it wasn’t meant to be hurtful. If you just let it go and gnaw at your insides, the other party will have no idea that you perceived something they said or did as hurtful and there will be a growing rage or resentment inside you toward this person you hold dear. That doesn’t sound healthy at all.
So when dealing with one another’s hearts, when sharing your deepest vulnerabilities, your hopes and fears, your darkness as well as light, take care to be cautious. Sharing brings us closer together, but what keeps us close is the understanding that we have to protect one another’s hearts from pain and heartbreak. Not to say that we are all always going to be the perfect friends and lovers, but at least to acknowledge that the responsibility is first and foremost our own. For we hold each other’s heart in our hands, and we should carry it carefully with love and respect to honor one another and our relationship together.


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